Thursday 21 May 2009

Is The Apprentice A Good Place To Find Aspiring Leaders?

I don't why I did it, but I watched last night's episode of The Apprentice after I had promised myself that I wouldn't again and sure enough it was awful. Morbidly compelling - but awful. It left me feeling very sad and I shouldn't do, because I was feeling sad that Alan Sugar and his two 'experts' had to sit on this for several weeks of their lives. At least I didn't.

Last night's episode saw the demise of a nice looking guy called Ben Clarke who, as an aspiring stockbroker, came to the final meeting dressed like Gordon Gecko and with his chest puffed out. He had said to the cameras just seconds before his immortal catchphrase in his smooth Belfast brogue, 'There is no way in hell I'm going to go down for this.' He did.

To be fair there wasn't much to choose between them. The four losers arrived in the Boardroom with a mixture between fatalistic hang-dog expressions and those of angry people. One of the angry was Ben who frankly couldn't see how awful he had been and had way too much opinion of himself for a 'barrow boy' business man like 'Sir' Alan Sugar.

Sugar had started by cutting him down to size in a mastery way - to his question about what had 'gecko' ever done, he had retorted, not for the first time, that he had a scholarship to Sandhurst, to which Sir Alan had said that he had been apprentice bugler in the Jewish Boys Brigade. But rather than diffuse the atmosphere or acknowledge faults, all contestants seem to arrogantly challenge Sugar with past glories that were supposed to show how good they were. They seemed to forget that he had seen the footage at first hand of just how rubbish they were.

They all resorted to 'Interview Speak' where you diplomatically avoid the question and give your pre-prepared answer - decent interviewers would have cut through those far earlier which is why not one of them should have been selected in the first place. But television is very different to business. I take comfort in that fact.

You see not one of the conniving, puerile little back-stabbing rats represented anything like management material and I feel sorry for Alan Sugar that he has take any one of them on. After a session like last night, how any one of them could work together again was a mystery and shows how contrived the whole program is.

But we fall for it. Despite all we know about business, we view it and watch it. Famously, Ruth Badger, a dour faced, sarcastic back-stabber who had the annoying habit of making faces when everyone else spoke which she clearly had learnt as good business body language from Sir Alan, had her own show in the footsteps of Sir John Harvey Jones' 'Troubleshooter'. Thankfully it didn't last long as there is only so much of lack of acumen and spite you can take. The Apprentice is simply nothing like business.

Ah well, rant over. I dare say I shall watch it some time again, just to see which of the sniveling wretches Sugar has to choose. Poor Sir Alan, he then has to work with them for a year - then again, you reap what you sow.

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